Saturday, March 21, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Zac probably called Andrew some sort of names
So I wasn't going to blog, I was just going to check email. Then about 3 mintes after Zac left the lobby (where we get our sweet, sweet wireless internets) and 2 minutes before I had planned on leaving, the heavens opened up and let loose a downpour which shows no signs of quitting any time soon. So... blog post time till the rain breaks.
I have basically no proof at all, but I figure Zac must have called Andrew names at some point or another. However, it is an absolute lie about Zac calling him shit for brains, even if the insult would have been warranted.
I go to a completely different place to work everyday than the rest of the clique. (and really, my gig is way cooler)
I get to ride the bus every day, which means I also get to meet some interesting people. Like yesterday when on the ride home a man who looked like a slightly more unkempt Tevye from Fiddler on the Roof let us know the reason he was having a great vacation. You know what made it great? Responding to a homeless woman smiling at him by making out with her and then moving the make out session into an alley and having forbidden semi-public sex with a homeless person. Apparently it's way better than sex with "the girls that come to the hotel and have sex for money."
You learn important things while traveling Miami-Dade transit system, extremely important things.
I have basically no proof at all, but I figure Zac must have called Andrew names at some point or another. However, it is an absolute lie about Zac calling him shit for brains, even if the insult would have been warranted.
I go to a completely different place to work everyday than the rest of the clique. (and really, my gig is way cooler)
I get to ride the bus every day, which means I also get to meet some interesting people. Like yesterday when on the ride home a man who looked like a slightly more unkempt Tevye from Fiddler on the Roof let us know the reason he was having a great vacation. You know what made it great? Responding to a homeless woman smiling at him by making out with her and then moving the make out session into an alley and having forbidden semi-public sex with a homeless person. Apparently it's way better than sex with "the girls that come to the hotel and have sex for money."
You learn important things while traveling Miami-Dade transit system, extremely important things.
i did not call andrew ANY names.
We were in the immigration courthouse here earlier, and the lawyer we were with was talking to one of the official interpreters. He was a truly charming old man; I bet he does fine, for real.
Anyway, when she first said hi to him and pointed out the three of us who were with us, he said: "Oh, are these the tundra people?"
Yes, we are.
Also we went to an Indian place for lunch, where a Lithuanian woman was our waitress. One of the food items she brought to me, she explained, was this: "It's the day of soup. I mean, soup of the day."
Words cannot express how proud I am of the as-far-as-I-know-undefeated traveling Minnesota beer pong team (of which I am not a part), as well.
Anyway, when she first said hi to him and pointed out the three of us who were with us, he said: "Oh, are these the tundra people?"
Yes, we are.
Also we went to an Indian place for lunch, where a Lithuanian woman was our waitress. One of the food items she brought to me, she explained, was this: "It's the day of soup. I mean, soup of the day."
Words cannot express how proud I am of the as-far-as-I-know-undefeated traveling Minnesota beer pong team (of which I am not a part), as well.
Quantos Anios, Beaches!
Tuesday March 17th
Dear Fans,
I’ve been thinking a lot about the format of these posts, and I have decided, after kicking it around with the other bloggers for a long while, that I should mention the day of the week as well as the date at the beginning of each post, so please be advised of this change. Oh yeah, and we’re in Miami!
We are staying at the Clay hotel and International Hostel in South Beach. It’s an okay hostel, but I probably only think that because the Econolodge was so very shitty. So shitty. The Clay is right in the middle of a pretty hoppin’ neighborhood. There are attractive people buying expensive things all around us! The dining is second-to-none-ish and also really expensive. No one has gotten sick or injured so far – knock on wood!
When we arrived the first night, it was about 11:00 PM and we sang some karaoke and then went to the beach. The beach was gorgeous! The moon was bright and high in the sky, the water was dark and beckoning, and the steady breeze spoke of the salty solace to be found behind each cresting wave. I threatened to take a shit in the sand, because I just wanted to get to the hostel and go to bed.
The interesting thing about the beach so far (which we re-visited the next day) is that it could really just be someone’s driveway somewhere with a stereo playing ocean noises. No one was doing anything beach-specific. No one was in the water except us, and everyone looked really unhappy with us for playing Frisbee in the sand – our bad! I guess we’re just Miami noobs.
Speaking of awkward confrontations with the locals, I have only really spoken with two of them, but each was an interaction I’ll cherish for at least 1 years. The first was today at lunch when Zac, Sarita, and I decided to try and guess where our waitress was from. She had an accent, you see, and kept saying funny things, like when she pointed to the soup Zac ordered and said, “This day of soup.” I guessed Holland, Zac guessed Turkey, and Sarita refused to guess, so her guess defaulted to Denmark, as per the Rules (FRCC, 8c). Turns out she was from Lithuania, which means that Sarita wins! That wasn’t so bad, but then she said some stuff that made me feel compelled to tell her that we were trying to guess, and what our guesses were. She thought we were funny, and I laughed, which was good. Then she asked where we were from, and I said, “America”, which was bad. “What a dumb thing to say,” I thought to myself as we left. Zac agreed (somehow).
Almost immediately after that, we were walking back to the hostel, and Sarita noticed a douchebag costume store. We went in, and Sarita picked out and bought a lovely pair of sun glasses while Zac and I tried to find even one thing we would actually wear there, if forced to at gun point (we did eventually find some flip-flops, which were actually so nice that Zac purchased them). As we were looking around at things, I accidentally looked at a green t-shirt – big mistake! A high-pressure sales guy noticed and came over and was all, like, asking me if I liked the shirt and asking why I wouldn’t try it on, and telling me that it’s only $20, down from $60. These shirts are very hard to find, he assured me. When I finally told him, “No, I’m good,” and started walking away, he became desperate, and asked, “Are you from England?” At which point I felt very much bewildered, and said that “I’m from America” – which was bad.
Dear Fans,
I’ve been thinking a lot about the format of these posts, and I have decided, after kicking it around with the other bloggers for a long while, that I should mention the day of the week as well as the date at the beginning of each post, so please be advised of this change. Oh yeah, and we’re in Miami!
We are staying at the Clay hotel and International Hostel in South Beach. It’s an okay hostel, but I probably only think that because the Econolodge was so very shitty. So shitty. The Clay is right in the middle of a pretty hoppin’ neighborhood. There are attractive people buying expensive things all around us! The dining is second-to-none-ish and also really expensive. No one has gotten sick or injured so far – knock on wood!
When we arrived the first night, it was about 11:00 PM and we sang some karaoke and then went to the beach. The beach was gorgeous! The moon was bright and high in the sky, the water was dark and beckoning, and the steady breeze spoke of the salty solace to be found behind each cresting wave. I threatened to take a shit in the sand, because I just wanted to get to the hostel and go to bed.
The interesting thing about the beach so far (which we re-visited the next day) is that it could really just be someone’s driveway somewhere with a stereo playing ocean noises. No one was doing anything beach-specific. No one was in the water except us, and everyone looked really unhappy with us for playing Frisbee in the sand – our bad! I guess we’re just Miami noobs.
Speaking of awkward confrontations with the locals, I have only really spoken with two of them, but each was an interaction I’ll cherish for at least 1 years. The first was today at lunch when Zac, Sarita, and I decided to try and guess where our waitress was from. She had an accent, you see, and kept saying funny things, like when she pointed to the soup Zac ordered and said, “This day of soup.” I guessed Holland, Zac guessed Turkey, and Sarita refused to guess, so her guess defaulted to Denmark, as per the Rules (FRCC, 8c). Turns out she was from Lithuania, which means that Sarita wins! That wasn’t so bad, but then she said some stuff that made me feel compelled to tell her that we were trying to guess, and what our guesses were. She thought we were funny, and I laughed, which was good. Then she asked where we were from, and I said, “America”, which was bad. “What a dumb thing to say,” I thought to myself as we left. Zac agreed (somehow).
Almost immediately after that, we were walking back to the hostel, and Sarita noticed a douchebag costume store. We went in, and Sarita picked out and bought a lovely pair of sun glasses while Zac and I tried to find even one thing we would actually wear there, if forced to at gun point (we did eventually find some flip-flops, which were actually so nice that Zac purchased them). As we were looking around at things, I accidentally looked at a green t-shirt – big mistake! A high-pressure sales guy noticed and came over and was all, like, asking me if I liked the shirt and asking why I wouldn’t try it on, and telling me that it’s only $20, down from $60. These shirts are very hard to find, he assured me. When I finally told him, “No, I’m good,” and started walking away, he became desperate, and asked, “Are you from England?” At which point I felt very much bewildered, and said that “I’m from America” – which was bad.
Monday, March 16, 2009
The Story Thus Far
Dear Fans,
On Saturday and Sunday we drove through the South – it was my first time! It’s been really exciting so far, but still no sign of Bigfoot.
The best part of the trip so far has been the Southern food! We went to a WAFFLE HOUSE this morning! The food was delicious! I would eat there every day if I could. I tried to call the waitress “Darlin”, but we all agreed that my Southern accent just isn’t good enough yet. I’ll work on it.
On the way down, we saw a lot of things that met and even exceeded my expectations! There were vast swaths of land being put to no productive use, 100-foot Confederate flags, and half-collapsed shacks with porch-lights on in the middle of the day and empty buckets strewn about the “yard”!
The worst part of the trip so far was the Econolodge we stayed at in Dalton, Georgia. I really can’t say enough bad things about it. The bathroom had pubes on the floor, there was mold on the ceiling, and the peeling wallpaper was patched up in some spots with gold paint. The wireless access was spotty, and, as Mike and Sarita found out during the night, the roof leaks. No ghosts, though, so at least there was some up side.
Everyone keeps saying we four are going to hate each other by the end of the trip, but so far the only problem area has been Zac. Zac really seems to want to ruin this for me. For example, when we got into Kentucky, I said that I wanted to play “Wagon Wheel” by Old Crow Medicine Show, because it was the only Bluegrass song on my I-pod. When the song started, Zac looked up from his Music Elitist magazine to say “Did you call this Bluegrass?” I apologetically said that I really wasn’t sure. But Zac couldn’t let it drop before calling me “shit-for-brains”.
The other two are far more agreeable. Sarita sleeps a lot, which is okay because when she is awake she is very energetic, always curious about things, and asking me lots of questions about science and medicine. Anderson brought along a great music collection, however I’ve noticed that when he answers the phone, he always makes us sit quietly and pretends he’s alone in the car. I wonder what he’s hiding, and from whom.
On Saturday and Sunday we drove through the South – it was my first time! It’s been really exciting so far, but still no sign of Bigfoot.
The best part of the trip so far has been the Southern food! We went to a WAFFLE HOUSE this morning! The food was delicious! I would eat there every day if I could. I tried to call the waitress “Darlin”, but we all agreed that my Southern accent just isn’t good enough yet. I’ll work on it.
On the way down, we saw a lot of things that met and even exceeded my expectations! There were vast swaths of land being put to no productive use, 100-foot Confederate flags, and half-collapsed shacks with porch-lights on in the middle of the day and empty buckets strewn about the “yard”!
The worst part of the trip so far was the Econolodge we stayed at in Dalton, Georgia. I really can’t say enough bad things about it. The bathroom had pubes on the floor, there was mold on the ceiling, and the peeling wallpaper was patched up in some spots with gold paint. The wireless access was spotty, and, as Mike and Sarita found out during the night, the roof leaks. No ghosts, though, so at least there was some up side.
Everyone keeps saying we four are going to hate each other by the end of the trip, but so far the only problem area has been Zac. Zac really seems to want to ruin this for me. For example, when we got into Kentucky, I said that I wanted to play “Wagon Wheel” by Old Crow Medicine Show, because it was the only Bluegrass song on my I-pod. When the song started, Zac looked up from his Music Elitist magazine to say “Did you call this Bluegrass?” I apologetically said that I really wasn’t sure. But Zac couldn’t let it drop before calling me “shit-for-brains”.
The other two are far more agreeable. Sarita sleeps a lot, which is okay because when she is awake she is very energetic, always curious about things, and asking me lots of questions about science and medicine. Anderson brought along a great music collection, however I’ve noticed that when he answers the phone, he always makes us sit quietly and pretends he’s alone in the car. I wonder what he’s hiding, and from whom.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
so far, so good!...
DALTON, Ga. - Man, today went well, but it really got off to sort of an inauspicious start when a stoplight on France in freakin' Edina wouldn't turn green. For what felt like hours. We wound up just running it. (Rebellion, etc.)
Wisconsin is just as lame to drive through as I remembered. Fortunately Michael took care of most of it. We stopped in Madison for gas and, theoretically, doughnuts, which turned into this thing where a girl who SEEMED nice, but clearly wasn't, sent us to a place that definitely was not the sort of bakery we were after - it was, instead, some sort of corporate headquarters for Sara Lee. (Think they need a clerk?) I'm still wondering what her motives were.
There's this town in Illinois called Effingham, which is funny enough, but apparently its high school athletic teams are nicknamed the "Flaming Hearts," which is gosh darn hilarious.
I didn't start driving until after a stop for gas in Antioch, Tennessee, where I went into the little convenience store to get a cup of coffee. The guy at the counter was completely mute through the entire transaction. At the end, he gave me my change, and I said, "Thanks, have a nice night." His response follows in its entirety: "Holy shit."
Okay, sure.
We did find the torts curve (Sullivan v. Crabtree, 258 S.W.2d 782). It was awesome - darkness and a little rain really helped set the mood. It's on Highway 41 (where that one Allman brother was born in the back seat of a Greyhound bus, yeah?) in Monteagle, Tennessee. It was too dark to take a picture, but we'll get it on the way back.
Our sincere hope was that there would be a terrible movie on at the hotel to watch, and that could not have worked out better - I'm gonna go watch Commando now.
Wisconsin is just as lame to drive through as I remembered. Fortunately Michael took care of most of it. We stopped in Madison for gas and, theoretically, doughnuts, which turned into this thing where a girl who SEEMED nice, but clearly wasn't, sent us to a place that definitely was not the sort of bakery we were after - it was, instead, some sort of corporate headquarters for Sara Lee. (Think they need a clerk?) I'm still wondering what her motives were.
There's this town in Illinois called Effingham, which is funny enough, but apparently its high school athletic teams are nicknamed the "Flaming Hearts," which is gosh darn hilarious.
I didn't start driving until after a stop for gas in Antioch, Tennessee, where I went into the little convenience store to get a cup of coffee. The guy at the counter was completely mute through the entire transaction. At the end, he gave me my change, and I said, "Thanks, have a nice night." His response follows in its entirety: "Holy shit."
Okay, sure.
We did find the torts curve (Sullivan v. Crabtree, 258 S.W.2d 782). It was awesome - darkness and a little rain really helped set the mood. It's on Highway 41 (where that one Allman brother was born in the back seat of a Greyhound bus, yeah?) in Monteagle, Tennessee. It was too dark to take a picture, but we'll get it on the way back.
Our sincere hope was that there would be a terrible movie on at the hotel to watch, and that could not have worked out better - I'm gonna go watch Commando now.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)